Ten Things That Annoy The Kindness Out Of Bavani In School

I was working on a list of things that make me happy a few weeks ago, but I stopped being happy very quickly. That list is stagnant now. I never expected to come up with ten items, anyway.

What I feel on a daily basis is annoyance. Every day, in school, I am annoyed. So, I thought, why not share the feeling? Sharing is caring, right? Right.

1. Public transport. The problem with public transport is the public. People are just so selfish. I know we're all familiar with inconsiderate commuters. My top nuisances include people who lean on poles, those who refuse to move to the back of the bus, and people who sit too close to me. Don't touch me, stranger.

2. That rule about latecoming. If you go to Temasek Polytechnic, you know the one I'm talking about. I get marked absent if I'm late by 15 minutes or more. And for Communication Skills, it's 5 minutes. What bullshit. I can't control some factors that make me 5 bloody minutes late. Such as traffic, weather and the sheer numerosity of students packed like sardines in the buses that pass by without even stopping at the bus stop from 8:30 am to 9:05 am.

3. Students who act like children. Young adults, 17 years old or older, roughhousing and mucking about in class and around campus. Dissolving into fits of giggles at every mention of anything sexual. Groaning about homework. Screaming and screeching and acting cute. Leaving behind empty food containers at computer labs and dirty plates and cutlery at foodcourts, expecting others to clean up after them. Released from the strict, structured schedule of secondary school, given freedom, instead of acting like adults, they act like 10-year-olds. I don't understand.

4. Smokers. I hate smelling cigarette breath from the smokers in any of my classes. Sometimes I avoid those who I know like to burn tar sticks and breathe poison. And the people who smoke at the bus stop outside school make me so angry. Smoke diffuses everywhere, and it smells disgusting, burns my lungs and gives me headaches. I get so pissed off that I sometimes want to rip out the smokers' lungs and throw them onto the road, speeding up their inevitable rotting deaths. I hate cigarette smoke.

5. Alpha females who are cold to me because they feel threatened. I'm really tired of this. I don't want to be the alpha of your group. Although I'm more than capable of being an alpha, I'm perfectly fine being a beta or omega. It may be my fault that they don't know this, though, because I act like a stuck-up smart-ass. I should tone it down a lilttle...

6. Sloppy dressing. I am frankly disgusted by those who wear shorts and slippers to school. It's just lazy. And what happened to the self-respect? Why would you step outside your house looking like you just woke up? And go to an educational institution looking like you're going to check your letter box? At least put on a pair of sandals, for fuck's sake. Which brings me to the next item on this list:

7. Flapping flip-flops. Slippers slapping against feet with every step. On the concourse, in the corridors, in the foodcourts, in classrooms, even in the library. It grinds on my nerves. It's such an irritating sound! Slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap. I don't know how people can stand to hear that sound all day when they wear slippers. I'd go crazy. Or barefoot.

8. Girls who dress like prostitutes. There are girls who dress well out of self-respect, and girls who choose their clothes motivated by the desire to attract guys. It's easy to tell the difference. Girls who dress for themselves wear nice clothes, and girls who dress for guys wear little clothes. Frankly, I'm sick of seeing butt cheeks hanging out of mini-shorts and bras peeking through see-through tops and breasts threatening to spill out of tight tank tops and brightly coloured underpants shouting "HI!" from beneath thin, clingy, translucent bottoms. It's unsightly and atrociously inappropriate for school.

9. Teachers who don't like to teach. They conduct lectures indifferently, go through tutorials mechanically and answer questions reluctantly. Students fall asleep during their classes and they don't care. When I ask them questions, they tell me to find answers on my own. I can't help but antagonise such teachers. I have as little respect for them as they have interest in teaching their subjects.

10. Going home. When the sun begins to set, birds gather in flocks to fly back to their nests. Similarly, humans gather in buses and trains to go home. Home, where they feel that they belong. Where everything is familiar. Where there are people who care about them. Where they feel safe and comfortable. I know I sound like a National Day Parade song, but you know what I'm getting at, right?

I don't have all that. All I return to is a cat. A beautiful, incredible cat whom I'm immensely glad to call my own. But there's got to be more to home, right? I don't care about anything else there. I could go anywhere with my cat and call it "home."

I didn't miss my mother's house at all when I stayed at Nisa's house. I had my cat. And I had a friend. I could have stayed there for ever without wanting to return to my room with all the clutter and emptiness. None of it matters.

What does matter?